“We must bear the ‘burden’ of being considerate of the doubts and fears of others.” (Romans 15:2, TLB)
Listening is probably the most important skill in building friendships and relationships. You can’t love people without listening to them.
But sometimes people run into trouble in their relationships when they think hearing and listening are the same thing. The truth is that there’s a big difference between hearing someone and listening to them.
You can hear something and not really be listening. I can’t tell you how many arguments I’ve had with my kids or my wife because I was hearing the words but not really listening to the emotions. Sometimes the words don’t even matter. Someone can say to you, “I’m fine,” but the way they say it tells you that they’re not fine. Listening means you also hear what the person isn’t saying.
When you listen that way, you’re showing empathy. Empathy means putting yourself in the other person’s shoes and learning their point of view. You ask yourself, “How would I feel if I were in that situation?”
Listening with empathy means you listen without interruption and listen for what’s not being said — the feelings and fears behind the words. And you don’t need to try to fix the situation. In fact, sometimes healing comes just from someone listening! Romans 15:2 says, “We must bear the ‘burden’ of being considerate of the doubts and fears of others” (TLB).
St. Paul also describes showing concern and care as described in 2 Corinthians 1:3-7: “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. For just as we share abundantly in the sufferings of Christ, so also our comfort abounds through Christ. If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer. And our hope for you is firm, because we know that just as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort.” This can be done through prayer, in situations where you can’t be present, and in prayer with the other person when you can, offering hope and encouragement. Is there a benefit to asking, “How would I feel if I were in that situation?”
What does it mean to be considerate or to bear the burden of someone else’s doubts? It means that, when people are in so much pain that they don’t even know what they believe, they need the devotion of a loyal friend. They need someone who will be present and listen with empathy.
Prayer
Pray for opportunity to intercede for the broken and suffering people of our world, our nation, and our nation’s leadership. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
Pray, praise, give thanks, and stay encouraged!
Pastor Mike
